Friday, 22 February 2013

Sh*t Fashion Bloggers Say

I've bite my blog tongue for long enough I feel, and usually I like my blog to be a happy postivie space which it is. But this blogger has sh*t to say. I don't know about you, but sometimes I can't help but laugh at the way some people behave in blog land. Yes I'm coining a term 'blog land', it's like they throw all reason out the window and this alter ego comes roaring out. I'm not claiming that I'm perfect or that I get it 'right'. Personal I think getting it right is what's right for you, blogging is great because it's your point of view. But and this is a massive red warning stop sign of a but, there are unwritten rules to how you interact with people and knowing when your just nose driving off into a place called entitlement self delusion.

In blog land I think there are the ' just be's vs the try hards ', the just be's are the bloggers who just blog for a creative outlet, a passion and to inspire others and if they make a little money or are praised it's a bonus. They are generally interested in one another and are happy that they have any readers. The try hards bitch about events people have been invited too, demand to know how others have followers and need to pour over every single detail of what another blogger is doing and why. Don't even get me started on helping within blog land, while the just be's write beautiful heartfelt posts about advice you could possible take. The try hards write 'how to's' about what your clearly doing wrong and how really you should just be in blogging for money, free shit and also to tell others why their blog will never be as successful. Plus let's not forget how they kindly correct  grammar, insult  style, point out issues with your body weight and make it sound like their doing you a favour. Because in reality they don't actual care, it's just a way to seem like they do plus get more hits to their site by spamming their link every where.

It get's even better when dealing with PR's see the just be's are happy, and actual excited when offered things from brands. If they don't feel it's them they kindly decline so that it can go to a blogger who will truly enjoy it. While the try hards are writing up their mental list of things that PR's 'NEED' to give me. Rather than talking to a PR as a person, the try hard believes that the soul reason PR's exist is to fill their wardrobes, beauty cupboards and well let's face it. Their whole home to the brim, with all that 'free shit' I mentioned earlier.

When it comes to getting to know one another, a just be is happy to ask questions and to answer questions within reason. The try hard is to busy thinking of how they brand their blog, to even give a crap that your in the room. Unless however they want to use you, for as their power point plan of how many hits your blog gets. Also lets not forget to probe other bloggers about what are those people who give me the free shit, oh yeah your PR contacts. The just be's may ask you a few questions about your blog, but don't demand or push others for information. there happy to share and give advice and swap ideas with one another. There's respect that somethings you don't ask, as it can be seen as rude. When giving criticism it's constructive and they would never want to hurt someones feelings. 

Shit fashion bloggers say, well we all say crap every now and again. The difference is when you have been drinking your own ego, and think that somehow you own blog land and that everyone in it should all hail to you. It's okay not to be the same, it's okay not to like everyone in blog land. It's not okay to be a nasty person who leaves hateful undertones, within a supposedly nice comment. It's not okay to send a PR a mass of demands, and question your not invited. Understand that you can't attend everything, sometimes it's nice when others have a chance to attend an event. 

PR's don't walk around with lists stapled to their foreheads of everyone, they find their contacts through social media, recommendations and so on. Please do me and blog land a favour, if your honestly just blogging for things than seat down and reflect. There's a thing called,wait for it .....Buying it yourself ....I know right, groundbreaking news. Yes it's nice to be gifted things, but that's not a reason enough for me to personal spend hours upon hours ..shooting, editing writing and talking with people. I blog because I'm bored, I'm a full time mum of two little boys. This is my space to create and talk with people, it's a way of keeping sanity and getting away from ' well my child can juggle fire' talk. I love being a mum, but I'm more than just someones mum. So please for people like me and other bloggers just give it up, go use all that entailment self delusion and go right your magazine about how wonderful you are or something. 

P.S To my lovely just be's, you rock and you make blog land magic. I love this video that was written and directed by Amy Watson for New Look. It stars three bloggers, two of who I know (sorry Monica I'm certain your a lovely gal too) mucho love for Heather from Effie's Makeup box and Jen from J Noir . I think the just be's will laugh at the hinted truths, while I'm sure the try hards will be asking 'why aren't I in this video! Glitter on toast anyone?



54 comments:

  1. Hahaha this is so funny! Brill video. xx

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    1. Glad to see your a just be ;P, I know I love it. Think everyone should rock banana shoulders next fashion week xx

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  2. There seem to be a few posts of this nature popping up on blogs recently- there's a revolution brewing! x

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  3. Glad to hear it, I think everyone is reaching a point where it's becoming a joke. Vive la Revolution ;P haha xx

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  4. I really hope I'm a just be *ever hopeful*

    Love <3

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    1. Really! Come on Laura of course your a just be, I remember when I first found your blog my first thought was ' this girl is so honest and brave' I love you for it. Your a babe xx

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  5. Brilliant post, brilliant video! What drove you to write the post? I'm curious as this it seems like this feeling has been growing for a while, between the just be tribe and the try hards (and ultimately I imagine a lot of us sit somewhere in between) but no one has been talking about it.

    I think one can be pro-brand/branding but still be a genuine good egg, but I do hate when I see people get jealous over an opportunity one blogger has been given and another one haven't - yeah it sucks but maybe there's a reason you/your blog was overlooked, maybe your readers aren't the right target market etc. I love it on #fblogger/bblogger chats etc when there are blog love/admiration topics as it gives us a chance to celebrate the good side, the inspiration and the sense of community.

    Anyway, ramble over - great post! : )

    SJ x

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    1. No I love your 'rant' haha your so right. I think I just got to a point were, I witnessed things over social networks and also first hand at people just acting like they knew everything and were demanding things like it was their human right. Than taking it a step beyond and being damn right nasty to people, about 'advice' for blogging and other things. Like you said I think it's find to put your blog out there etc, but there's a fine line between getting it out there and just plain spalling it in people faces. Yes, community is so important, to bring both new and old bloggers together, ones with massive followings and those with maybe just 1 reader. Everyone's point of view should be heard, and everyone should know that were all people at the end of the day. I actually starting the floggers tag, as I loved the bbloggers one but hated spamming up their side with fashion things. I think there are some amazing just be's who are very pro active with their blog, but like you said their good eggs and a the reason I love to blog and be part of this community. I saw this video at a New Look event, and I was laughing so hard I think it's good to know what your about and not let things go to your head. Thanks for this comment xxxx

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  6. This is spot on haha and i bloody loved that video it was so funny! Xxx

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    1. I think New Look did a perfect job, glad you enjoyed the post. xx

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  7. I haven't been a blogger for very long really, but I completely get what you are saying! I can't watch the video because I am at work, but I have definitely set a reminder on my phone to watch this later xx

    emily-underneaththelights.blogspot.com

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    1. Yes watch it later, I'm not sure it was always like this. It just annoys me, as their are so many lovely people and these people just give bloggers a bad name. Also how they think they 'help' people with their awful comments and advice. xx

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    1. I really want to meet Amy Watson, it's so well written. Glitter on toast ! haha

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  9. Haha brilliant post lovely lady, and so true! I am constantly amazed at some of the things I read in blogs and on Twitter and wonder why I ever started following certain bloggers...maybe they weren't always like that? But I can't remember that long lost time.

    Try not to let the try hards get to you, if anything they just deserve pity.

    http://www.rafflesbizarre.blogspot.com

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    1. Amen to that. Oh I think I've reached a point were I'm over even caring what any try hard does. I just keep my distance and avoid them, sometimes it's easier said than done. I think after writing this, I feel I've addressed it, and now I can let go and just laugh at the stupidity of it. Oh I don't pity them, that's another thing some like to play off and even use (seriously you would not believe some of the things I've seen and heard). Let's not go there, they deserve to be forgotten :P that's what I'll be doing after this. xxxx

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  10. Ahh sometimes when I'm at a low ebb, and I'm wondering why I bother with blogging, I think about these things. Most of the time though I'm content with just blogging myself, commenting on the blogs I love, and focusing on what inspires me; and just completely ignoring the "try hards", as you say. Life's too short!
    X

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    1. Indeed I think that's the best advice is to ignore them. I think when their there in real life it gets harder, but not impossible. Yeah I think we all get the blog woes every now and than. I think it's talking with other bloggers in the community to know that actually people do care, and love your blog. I know you are very much part of it, I think twitter is a massive part of bloggers connecting and just yesterday we were chatting about things. Yeah I wish I had more time to spend on others, lately I've read blogs but been sad that I've not had time to comment as much. I think also it's good not to forget about your everyday life. Mucho love as always xxx

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  11. Well said!! Love your post and love the video too - some people are really mean and negative when commenting on blogs, i don't get it as there is no need for it whatsoever!! I also don't get ego's, i think some bloggers think they're 'famous' or too good for other bloggers and it makes me cringe a little! Loved reading your LFW bits too :) X

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    1. aww thank you, and I couldn't agree more xx

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  12. I think I'm a 'don't try enough'.. Hahaha.. I always have so much I want to write about and share but it's a challenge finding time to even write one post a week.

    I always look at the 'try hards' as people who don't have much of a life. They sit at their screens all day and they live online rather than in the real world.

    Mwah xx

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    1. hahha yeah I think that too, I think they literally live through their blog. xx

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  13. As a 'just be' blogger and someone who works in media/PR this is so nice to read. The internet can be such a friendly place most of the time and you show that Laura!
    Cx
    Shopped and Dropped

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    1. :P it annoys me because I don't want people see me talking to someone and think their buddies they must be the same when most of the time I'm just being polite. I would love to go up to PR's sometimes and be like, I'm with the nice people over here not that vile person over there. haha Aww yeah I think there are plenty of just be's to out way the try hards. Your too kind :) xx

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  14. We want some Glitter on Toast now!!! haha! Brilliant post :) x

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    1. Me too, and don't forget to Instagram a picture.

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  15. I LOVED the video. Great blog post, I always think people should appreciate the things they receive big or small and be grateful, to many times you see bloggers take things for granted down to the items to their followers. For me I smile when somebody reads my blog or commented, and for me it's something nice/good a distraction from my illnesses just for that moment. Bloody hell I've rambled sorry.
    Xxx

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    1. Love you Lucy, I'm so glad you have your blog and got to meet you. I think like you say some people just take everything for granted, and don't see just how bloody lucky they really are that they are blogging, that anyone reads, that a brand may send them something nice. I think your dead on girl ;P you can ramble any time to me xxx

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  16. Ha, this is a brilliant post, brilliant video, made me cackle! But as above, what drove you to write the post? This is the first blog post of yours I have come across xx

    http://beautyqueenuk.blogspot.co.uk/

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    1. I've had not written an 'issues' post for a while, as I tend to only write them when something has been on my mind a lot. I think I just had to vent, I actually wanted to write this post about 2 months ago but I thought maybe it's just me. Than as time wore on I had to vent, I think it's better too than get in an argument with someone who wouldn't listen to you anyway.

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  17. Hi, I'm not a fashion blogger, I'm in a different "blog world" but the issues are exactly the same! I agree with everything you wrote, it's actually so horrible and two faced in my blog world right now. Recently I've experienced total blog betrayal from so called people I thought who were my friends :'( So called friends questioning how I managed to SURPASS them in likes on facebook, outright demanding when it happened covered up with a fake "lol". I didn't even know we were in competition. Going through my Facebook friends list and adding anyone they think are possible contacts. Outright copying. I've literally stopped talking at blog gatherings because I know they are ready to pounce on any sort of idea I have and blog it as their own, then go around spamming it everywhere. Can't trust anyone, even the ones you thought are mature professionals. Sorry for rambling, but your post really clicked and I just wanted to say thank you for your post. Screw these try hard! BRING ON THE BLOG EVOLUTION! THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME HOPE! I love your blog! :)

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    1. Thanks for this, yeah it's not just fashion bloggers it's more aimed at just all bloggers. That's sad to hear, and good on you for moving on and not letting them get you down xxx

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  18. Loved Heather in the video - I think she got it spot on! Gosh, I hope I never come off as a 'try hard'! I think the internet can sometimes bring out the very worst in people, as an avid mmo player, I come into contact with a lot of trolls and general knobs! It is nice to know that there are a lot of genuine and lovely blogger's around who take an interest in others. I'm always excited by every comment I receive, I really do treasure each one! xxx

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    1. I know she's such a babe, I love when she throws down her coat! haha

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  19. Ooft, I couldn't be bothered with the hassle that the try hards go to. I don't even have a blogging schedule. If I post, I post. End of. I do this for me - an outlet for boredom, just like yourself. I people comment, my day is made! If a PR ever offered me something, that would e awesome, but a bonus to what blogging actually gives me - an outlet, stimulation for creativity and, most importantly, an awesome community of lovely, like-'minded ladies. Great post, I think it's time to call these try hards out! Xo

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    1. So true, I mean who has the time to be chasing people for things, it's like give it up. Thank you and yes I agree we do have a great community ;P x

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  20. This video is brilliant. I'm very new to 'blog land' and yet to encounter the negativity (I'm stil a baby in my blog life so I'm sure it's bound to come along) but this video - and your post - hit the nail on the head. I think it doesn't matter what you do now days, there's always going to be people looking to get one up on others regardless of how they do it, some people are just that way inclined and the internet brings that negativity a whole new platform. Though it's great that even a huge brand such a New Look recognise how ridiculous it can get! Your posts are a really interesting read and love your LFW day 1 outfit!!

    Steph

    www.styleanonymous.com

    x

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    1. I hope you never do encounter it sweetie, and yes it is fab that even New Look have picked up on it. Aww thank you xx

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  21. Amazing, amazing post, you speak the truth and the whole truth. Blogging is such a personal thing and even though we post it to the world, it is still OUR OWN space on the net. I hate when other bloggers criticize others. Of course you are entitled to your own opinion (e.g. mine is hate of the garish and OTT blog designs or spamming about 'advertising packages'), but in the end - why care? Just keep working on making your blog better and focus on yourself for a change rather than poke around someone else's grammar or size...

    I love discovering new blogs, I LOVE going to blogger meet-ups and getting to know real people behind. I am aware that not everyone has this kind of luxury, but let me tell you - when you meet someone in person, you wouldn't publicly bash someone. So behave online and keep your dignity!

    XOXO

    mademoiselle-lala.com

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    1. ;P Totally, and yeah I think it's far better to put the effort into your own blog too xx

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  22. Beautifully written and thank you for mentioning me, touched.

    xx

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    1. love you too missy, got to keep it real :P xx

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  24. woohoo go you. i guess i'm not in the proper fashion blogger loop as much, maybe also being a male makes a sort of difference too, not being around bitching as much. mind you i'm sure the fellas have a good go to. blog for the right reasons, surely that's the only way you can be properly happy

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    1. I don't think it's just fashion bloggers, I've seen it in all forms of blogging. Trust me man can bitch too :P hahaha Thanks Mat, nice to hear from the man's side.

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  25. Have you've seen Get Off My Internets? It's so awful to read blogs that have nothing positive to say. I'm so annoyed when you point out the immaturity of a blogger and they react as if their blog is sacred. So many great blogs are the ones that have character and personality.

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    1. No but I'll google it. Thanks and YES so true x

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  26. I love the post but dislike the video- when she talks about standing out and being different- how is she really being different, with disco pants etc? A lot of bloggers just say theyre "different" but stay wearing the same "different clothings" thats why I love Susie Bubble etc cause they know its not just about clothes! If it was just about clothes it would be "styling"- sorry if that sounded rant-y. had to get that off my chest but great post neverthereless!

    maximalistmina.blogspot.co.uk
    PS completely agree, hate that some bloggers just care about how many followers they have! xo

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    1. The video is more of a send up, if you check out Heather's (main girl in the video) blog you will see she has her own style (she's one of my fave bloggers). This was more about how some get a bit to 'look at me, copy me'. I do understand what you mean, but no Heather is a babe and I love that she doesn't take her self seriously and can have a laugh like this. Very much a just be xx

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  27. Totally get what you are ranting about.. And that video is hilarious! X

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  28. This is such a great post!!!! xx

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